There once was a Jazzman named Boozer
Whose rhetoric was a confuser:
"I'll get raised irregardless"
When the market said "far less."
He was traded and labeled a loser.
There once was an agent called Uncle
Whose negotiating strategy stunkle.
To drive up the bargain
He claimed the client liked Aregon
And now he'll get 10% of the bundle.
When Maynor was drafted his Mom cried,
Tears of joy, said she, although she lied.
Why oh why to Salt Lake?
Where rooks don't get a break
And they won't, until J-Slow has died.
Deron the PG was one cool cat.
During all of the drama of summer he sat
and used jedi mind tricks
to cause KOC's picks.
He's in charge of this team and that's that.
CJ got paid like a fat cat
Then he learned it was meant as a contract!
"You're expected to work
And defend (even if it hurts)
Take a charge, take a foul, make some contact!
A giant, last name of Fesenko,
was an athlete with tons of talento.
Sloan tried to be patient
'Til Fes made free agent,
And then finally decided to let go.
There's a Buckeye known here as The Koof
Whose ceiling is sky since his floor is the roof,
As soon as Sloan plays him
And management pays him
The league will know he is the Troof!
(I better quit on that one. Submit your own in comments. I promise to keep my red pen in the drawer where it's been all Summer.)