Presenting SLC Dunk's First-Ever Recap in Song (Utah vs. NO)

 

 

Direct link in case the player doesn't work for you: Nobody Ever Shut It Down Like You

Lyrics:

(to the tune of Alicia Keys' "Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart"; bolded parts are original lyrics)

Preseason injury took CJ Miles away
Season went downhill from there
Strained back, broken hand, busted knee
And even at the bottom of the sea
I can still see wins blown this year
Even though, game tapes, you study...

And all the time you were tellin' me lies, hey

So tonight, I'm gonna find a way to make it without you
Tonight, I'm gonna find a way to make it without you
Gonna hold on to Stockton-to-Malone, tonight
I'm gonna find a way to make it without you

Have you ever tried playing through an injury
And have you ever tried guarding your man

'09-'10, Utah Jazz, nobody ever shut it down like you
You wear the crown
You make my heart feel Hades-bound
Why don't you get a T
Jerry, I thought you told me
We'd be playing D

Looking at the court, I see empty seats
And I know right where I fit in
I hate, myself, you know that I'll always be in love with you
Right til the end

So tonight, when you find a way to redefine crap
and lose to the Peskies and their mom
Gonna hold on to Stockton-to-Malone, tonight
Futility, thy name is, Utah Jazz

Anybody could've told you right from the start
It's about to fall apart
That's what happens when you have no heart
and keep mailing it in

Memo Booze Kyle Ronnies Deron
AK CJ Sap
I'm addressing all yall tonight

(So tonight, when they) dunk on you, and Boozer's yelling
"Get it Memo!", I'll be trying not to scream
Gonna hold on to Stockton-to-Malone, tonight
I'm gonna find a way to make it without you

STOP sucking
Stop sucking
Boozer's not gonna get a raise regardless, I want old AK back and his hair, play Fes, I've had enough, I need therapy...


I apologize in advance for:

1) my voice--the key of the song is a little high for my range (or lack of);
2) the quality of the audio--I have no equipment or know-how to make this sound better
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