I have a Google Alert set up for Shan Foster. You would too, if your favorite team traded for a player who will never make the NBA, just because they wanted to make you happy (note: this was probably not the Jazz's rationale). It tells me on a weekly basis if there is any Shan Foster news. Most weeks, this email never arrives, because there is no Shan Foster news. This is because Shan Foster is pretty terrible (evidence: he shoots under 40% in the D-League).
This week though, there was Shan Foster news, and it came in the form of a song. This was an exciting piece of news for me, as the reason I loved Shan Foster in the first place was his brilliant turn as a singer-songwriter in his "NBA Draft Song" (more detail here). This work, however, comes in the form of a collaboration between himself and former Vanderbilt teammate Mario Moore. Warning: it is not as good. More detailed warning: it is probably NSFW, for reasons of lyrics.
So, that exists. In order to get back to the reasons why we loved Shan Foster in the first place, and why we really, really hope he discovers how to be good at basketball again, here's the NBA Draft song. If you haven't heard this before, I highly recommend it. Remember that he is a Jazz player, and to love him as much he loves basketball.
And then cry (like Homestar), once you realize he's never achieved his dream. Life is so unfair.