The 2015-2016 Utah Jazz season is over. All those lucky socks that resulted in numerous painful close losses have finally been washed. The Stockton and Malone jerseys have been returned to their offseason resting place in the closet. The NBA League Pass app has been deleted from your phone, and it's time to rediscover what it's like to not have firm plans after 7:00 MST again.
But beneath it all, the urge of Jazz fandom runs deep.
You keep checking twitter as if there's another game to be played.
You keep refreshing SLCDunk.com eagerly waiting for some news to break.
You check the injury report out of habit, someone must have got hurt today.
You talk to your friends about the Jazz in present tense as if the Jazz could still make the playoffs.
You flipped the channel to Root Sports and watched a Rockies game. You're not even a Rockies fan. You just wanted to see those familiar graphics and commercials.
You keep telling your wife about how you think Dante Exum grew and is now 6'9", you think. It's hard to tell from the photos. But you know.
If you have done even one of these things, you're an addict. A Jazz addict.
You're a glutton for pain and remorse. But luckily there's a 7 step plan for recovery. If you follow this plan you'll slowly feel the pain of missing the playoffs turn into hope and excitement for the next season. Guaranteed.
NBA Draft Combine
The first step of recovery will not require you to watch any playoff basketball. Too many of our recovering Jazz addicts watch other teams achieve their yearly goals and it sends them into a tailspin. Soon they wish that team was their team. They get angry. Vengeful, even. They go to twitter. That spirals out of control and soon they are photoshopping Crying Jordan on every positive Jazz memory they have at 2am. Why would you do that? That's John Stockton's shot to put the Utah Jazz into the NBA Finals. You have to work the next day. Why?
So in order to get you onto the right path we're going to start with a confession.
You like to watch terrible basketball and that's okay.
"I like to watch terrible basketball and that's okay."
If you didn't, you wouldn't be a fan of a team not in the playoffs. It's painful. It hurts. But it's the first step.
Now, because you enjoy watching terrible basketball we are going to put your addiction of watching terrible basketball on your computer screen to better use. Did you know there are mountains of basketball games on terribly played basketball games on the internet? Cross my heart and hope to die. These piles of basketball footage feature tons of players who COULD play for your basketball team next year. No, I'm not messing with you. There is a next season. One of those players could be the savior of your franchise. Wouldn't it be great to learn about these guys before you boo them at the draft party because you can't pronounce their name? OF COURSE IT WOULD BE.
I know what you're thinking, "I don't know how I'd begin to start sorting through all of this information to learn about these players." Well, guess what? You don't have to. There are lots of people who already do this kind of stuff for you. In addition to just pulling together all this information about these guys, it all culminates in wonderfully futile and overblown coverage of players being interviewed and being measured by their athletic ability.
This wonderful event will take place May 11-16, 2016. This will be televised on NBAtv. More details will follow, but the important thing right now is to be ready for it. If you are not prepared for it then how will you ever be ready to take a double overtime game against the Golden State Warriors? We are here to build you up again.
With that said, there are some things that you must do during this step to fully move onto Step 2.
What? There's Upbeats? Yes. What are upbeats? Well we have downbeats, but we're not looking down. We're looking up. These are things you can do to start putting the pieces of your soul back together again. Look I don't make the rules. Do you want to feel complete? LET ME COMPLETE YOU. I'm reaching out to you and waiting. Pull yourself together.
- Bookmark SLCDunk.com. Duh. But we're going to giving you the sweet nectar of relief of NBA information leading up to the 2016 NBA Draft Combine. We're here for you. That's what our comment section is for. Follow us on Twitter and Like our page on Facebook for good measure.
- Start looking at different NBA Draft sites for more information. These sites include the following: DraftExpress.com, ESPN.com, UtahJazz.com, and NBADraft.net to name a few. These sites will give you an insight as to who the Utah Jazz could be drafting.
- Watch the event. Yes. You have to. Do you really want to be the person who booed the guy who is about to save your franchise and bring a championship to Utah? No, I didn't think so.
- Follow our coverage of the event. We have attended and covered the event for the past 2 years now. We were the first people to interview Rudy Gobert. True story.
- Play the ESPN NBA Lottery Mock Draft game until the Utah Jazz get the #1 pick in the draft.