Rudy Gobert: Demon Hunter

One of my favorite fantasy (fantasy is a funny word for true things) novels is called the Warded Man by Peter Brett. In it there is a man who discovers symbols that protect him from demons. Eventually, he finds that when he tattoos the symbols directly onto his body, he becomes invincible to any demon who attacks him.

I couldn’t help but think that the symbols on the Warded man are somewhat similar to what Rudy Gobert is using in his hair.

Some may say, “James, you teletubby looking ginger, this is bunk.” Well, guess what, Rudy told us this is exactly what he is doing!!!

Much like Demonology, Rudy has created a basketball version that I have coined Swirology.

Many are probably skeptics like Joe Ingles, but that would be a terrible mistake! It is incredibly important that we study Swirology and then decide what symbols Rudy should be using!

Rudy’s original swirl was a simple swirl.

After an awkward amount of searching, this simple swirl seems to be the Viking symbol “Kano” which means “Opening”

Obviously, Rudy used this symbol to open himself to the teachings of Quin Snyder. Rudy was just a fledgeling, lanky Demon Hunter when he entered the league. But, using this symbol, he became stronger as he grew in understanding.

Rudy’s new swirl came about a month ago and he wore it for two to three weeks.

After an inordinate amount of study (it took a while), it seems that Rudy’s symbol was a variation of the symbol “Don” from the Enochian alphabet.

Apparently, the Enochian alphabet (a perfectly believable and real alphabet) was/is used to do some sort of Angel magic. I for one am comforted to know that our superstar center is invoking the power of angels to defeat his enemies. Also, I am happy that Rudy is not evil.

But, one can only wonder, what would happen if Rudy invoked darkness? Could he handle that? Would it make him stronger? It is an interesting thought, and one that Rudy surely ponders constantly. Personally, I am scared at the thought and am now wondering what that strange noise is in the corner of my room.

The most interesting thing? From the time Rudy wore this symbol (January 21) to the end of a long road trip that ended February 8, the Jazz went 6-3. What happened? Rudy’s hair grew and the symbol faded. Directly after that, we went on a three game losing streak. NOT A COINCIDENCE!

You may think this is dangerous for Rudy. Fear not, it is clear that Rudy has been in training to fight evil from a very young age.

This is Rudy as a young boy training to fight demons and all other forces of evil. #tbt seems to be an abbreviation for Tibet which is possibly a place where Rudy studied martial arts with the Tibetan monks. He probably spent that time attaining inner peace, as well, while he prepared for the tempting darkness.

It is my hope that Rudy eventually moves back to Viking symbology at some point. I feel as though he could use the symbol “Algiz” which means protection or “Eihwaz,” meaning defense. Better yet, I hope Rudy does some sort of epic combination of the two!

This is an incredible discovery made by the best center in the league. If Rudy command Swirology with more precision, he will have more power to dominate the league. There’s no telling how good he can become.