Breaking: Milos Teodosic Got Married Today, Strengthens Jazz DNA

This is big news guys.

Here is the photo posted by CSKA Moscow’s Instagram:

Analysis:

Obviously this holds tremendous significance and relevance to the basketball world. Marriage improves his standing with the Utah Jazz, via his development of “Jazz DNA”. If we suspect him to be having twins in the near future, expect his contract to be a done deal ASAP.

If I am interpreting my multi-lingual Google searches correctly, his wife, Jelisaveta Orsanin, is an actress from Serbia. You know who else married an Eastern European woman? Andrei Kirilenko, who also played for the Utah Jazz. Coincidence? I think not!!

In reality, this is only a fun piece of news concerning a possible Jazz target. Milos may or may not even step foot onto an NBA court, and he likely wouldn’t move the needle much either way in the Gordon Hayward sweepstakes. Milos already has plenty of reasons to want to play for the Utah Jazz, and on a more serious note marriage may make Utah an even more appealing destination for him. If he was signed to play for the Jazz, it’s easy to envision him staying out the rest of his career in the Rocky Mountains, assuming he gives us reason to keep him on the roster.

Regardless, our congratulations go out to Milos and Jelisaveta. Мы желаем вам успеха и всего наилучшего. (-We wish you success and all the very best.)