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The AB (Government Initials) Looking Fresh Edition - The Downbeat - #1726

Randy Rigby shared on 1280 what he does when someone asks for permission to marry one of his daughters:

Literally, my daughters and my children mean the world to Sandra and I, and I don’t take it lightly. And so, literally, when I sit down with these young men, they come in to ask for their han–for their, her hand in marriage, and my permission, I spend about an hour and a half asking the hard questions. And I literally want to know about their background, some of their issues and their challenges and where their goals are, what their aspects are, of, in life, and things. …

After I do that, then I have a little tradition. I then, also, after they’ve asked and I’ve given permission, I says, now you’ve come to ask a question, a favor from me. I says, now I want to ask one of you.

And I set out in front of them a box, wh–that’s wrapped up. And I ask them to open it up, and they open it up, and inside of it is a pearl. And I open up the Bible, the story of a pearl of great price. And I said, you’ve come here and you’ve asked for one of my pearls. And it is of the greatest price to me. And I says, I want you to then take this pearl, and I want you to then keep it into your pocket.

And I says, then, as you go out into the world and get confronted and maybe approached by people that look, you know what, you’re having a bad day with my daughter or things aren’t going well or you’ve had a fight, and all of a sudden maybe a secretary or a assistant or a nurse or something else that looks attractive to you* when you’re having a hard time.**

I says, I want you to reach in your pocket and remember the pearl that is into your pocket that I’ve given you, and you’ve promised to treat and take care of for the rest of your life, and I expect you to honor that commitment. And it’s been a good little effect.

* Secretaries, assistants and nurses. Harlots, the lot of them. ** UDQM. Lol.

How would you rate his strategy?

Probably the most informative Alec Burks update we've gotten all summer (courtesy p.sads, who shared this in yesterday's DB comment section):

I saw AB at City Creek today looking fresh, Chick-fil-a in hand.. talking on his phone though so I didn’t want to bother him. I just gave him a head nod and he returned the love.

The Playmate of the Year 2014 cannot wait to see new Jazzman Jeff Withey. Yes, you read that correctly.

Twitter Jazz fan @1tobeamup shared a pic of an old autographed Jazz pennant she has.

The top autograph is identifiable as "John Stockton," but who are the other two? (H/T @dianaallen)